PREDICAMENT

Restless today.  Don’t know what to do with myself.  I know what I want to do, but I don’t know how to do it, that is to say.  I no longer want to be my thinking mind, egoic self, this person.  I want to be what cannot be named or described.  It is not as though I cannot access it.  I can access it at any moment in the day.  It’s just that I cannot be it, cannot become it.